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dear deep in heart,

haaa...so long time i din't outing my feeling to you deep in heart,1 month din't see and now come june, hmmm,love?hehe love love love still love her,i can't forget her,she is something special that hard to find in this world and maybe she the last 1 only,i still keep thinking of her,when i close my eyes then i was imagine her face,the way she smile,the way her beautiful eyes seeing exactly to my eyes then my heart will be nervous so fast and fast and furius 5...haha...oh telling about that movie it was fantastic and awesome,so cool i'm enjoying anyway...ok back to the story,hmmmm, i don't know how her feeling to me maybe she don't love me anymore because i can feel she happy with someone guy that i know who is him,maybe i regret all in my life, regret because before i can't apreciate her so much,i was not mature,always not trusting her and know that god want to show that i'm not for her because of myself that selfish and can't take care her that better, if i got power and can use 1 time only i want to use to see what in her heart,who she loving?are i'm still in her heart,if i'm still have even just a bit i will be improvement and change to be more mature and be more responsibility and love her all the time and last i want marry her and take care her and my son until i die!!!that a promise,but without her also now i try to learn something to be more mature,learn from my mistake how to be apriciate girl more,how we need give our love all the time to them and know what them like and don't like and also understand their carrier is important how their want to be,give them space too,spent time and important is take care their love and loving each other what in love needed...

other girl come suddenly?
at my place work got girl student print her assignment,3 times ready she come at my work place and the first that she come with her friend girl also come and ask me to find map for her assignment i try help but i can't find because of slow internet and of cause i see her and she see me,i was telling in heart she was beautiful and we always see each other to many times and i think i just like her because she i feel ok la...just like not love...like and love is different.then second time she come she want to reload and she give her phone number to me to reload her but i don't know she just coming to do that?i can feel she want me to sms me but i just make don't understand because ya maybe she just really want to reload and don't have feeling to me anything,that emberassing...then third she come with many her gf and she want print something then i and her like change not joke and shy each other because before we like to joke and laugh again when something funny but now like shy each other and keep looking, i don't know what happen, then now i don't even see her ready...haha i can feel that she have a bf alrady,how come a beautiful girl don't have bf...that lie...hmmm anyway i like her,the way she react and talking...she a good girl...anyway that i call girl suddenly now i don't see her ready i don't know what happen because it just suddenly...to my love i still love you!!!

the way she talk?
before she ever talk that don't wait for her,haiz maybe that she want me to forget her and keep with my love to find other but i don't understand why she so seriously talking like that even before she ever seriously say to me love me so much and won't leave me and promise that i'm forever and ever promise want to marry me 1 day and get a baby...and i was soooo seriously too...i don't know how get her plus she was far away again and i don't know where she is now...at least tell me and don't make me blur ,maybe she just can tell she have someone else ready and i think that fact...haiz i'm not say this to hurting her but just want to know and understand something,i don't want her will mistake with my words...how happy if she can still say love me infront of me and give me a hug...i'm so miss her so much,i wish can get her a hug and a kiss again...but got again important how to take her heart?i don't care if she have someone or not until she not married and tell me she have someone that special ready i won't broke hope to her...i love you delia...andel still in my heart...thanks...